Do you like my title? I thought it made me sound young and American and a bit of a dick. Only one of those things is true. Anyway now I’ve drawn you in here’s my list of stuff to keep small children entertained when they’re stuck indoors because someone thought it was a good idea to close school/ […]
As a new mum I found the choice of things to do with my baby confusingly scary. Who knew that babies wanted to learn French? I mean apart from French babies – obvs in France it’s a basic requirement along with being chic, not getting fat and writing books telling everyone else how much better French […]
It’s Christmas and the perfect time to be thinking about holidays. It’s not like there’s anything else I do should be getting on with right? Mark Warner are looking for bloggers to be their holiday ambassadors. I think I would be brilliant at this – but then in my mind I’m brilliant at most things. […]
No I’m not putting the small children on the tree. But then writing ‘with the help of small children’ didn’t feel right either. So here is ‘How to decorate a tree while two small children fight over a felt robin and attempt to strangle each other with tinsel’. Step 1 Check into social media and discover that […]
Hooray! After just 100 years of being sexist twits Ladybird books are to stop gender branding their books – no more books ‘for boys’ and books ‘for girls’ just books for reading. Part of me thinks this is a brilliant step in the right direction and the other part of me is absolutely fucking fuming. […]
I bloody love a quiz. This one’s abut poo. Answer these questions to determine if it’s time to start potty training: 1. Are you happy to have a toddler shit all over your home for the next 2 weeks? 2. Have you bought so many nappies you could buy a house with the Boots Advantage points you’ve […]
Blogfest last year was my first ever big blogging event. As I descended the escalator into the hall full of people I half recognised from Twitter I thought: Shit! I’ve made a terrible mistake. Fast forward 12 months and there I was gliding down the escalator into a hall full of people I actually knew and this […]
I was going to make this a top 5 list but I could only think of 4. That’s what a hopeless romantic I am. I’d like to point out that I am not getting divorced but if I ever do get married and then go on to get divorced it will probably be for one of […]
Shit they should tell you about Halloween… but no one does because it would scare the living crap out of you. 1. The early start On the 31st October you will be woken up at 6.30am by a small child in full witches garb shaking you and demanding to be taken trick or treating. Don’t worry […]
Dear Tescoses, I am writing to inform you of an issue with a packet of bagels I purchased from one of your stores. Skipping downstairs one crisp October morning after snuggles in bed with my two delightful children, my 2 year old son began demanding bagels by charmingly stamping his feet and shouting ‘I want […]
