Mr Eeh Bah is ‘between jobs’ aka at home getting right on my tits.
So far this week I have been pulled up on my bed making skills which are apparently below the acceptable standard – the sheets have been on the bed for so long I really think he should take it up with them directly.
I am also not loading/ unloading the dishwasher correctly – this is a bizarre complaint because I am neither loading or unloading the dishwasher AT ALL.
Finally I am folding the corners of my books in an incorrect fashion but not to worry as he demonstrated the correct technique last night in bed. We will not be having any more children.
On a positive note in between seminars on domestic chores we get to spend quality time together as a family. This week we took advantage of the sunny weather and went for a family picnic at the local RHS gardens.
We arrived in high spirits (that’s not a euphemism for drunk) and spread out our blanket in the middle of a group of mums with babies only to realise we had left the actual picnic at home. Not to worry we are very resourceful and took the opportunity to adapt our plans and have a massive row on a blanket in the sun instead.
Apparently it was my fault the picnic was left behind, I think I was distracted as I had been busy forgetting to pack the sun cream at the time.
I offered to go fetch coffees and a replacement picnic and left Mr Eeh Bah to dispense the emergency Monster Munch.
When my precious firstborn was tiny another child offered her a Dorito, I swiftly snatched the offending orange triangle away and Googled the ingredients in a complete panic. Fast forward four years and now I was the one handing out snacks of death while mums of tiny, clean babies all slathered in sun cream and wearing sunhats looked on in abject horror.
Except I wasn’t. I was queuing up to buy coffees. Mr Eeh Bah was getting all the evils.
Serves him right for letting me forget the picnic.
Here’s how to really win at picnics with a baby.