Parenting Job Description

Required Knowledge, Skills, and Abilities

• Above average skills in: Cataloguing and maintenance of a variety of special sticks, leaves and pine cones.

All candidates should be able to identify and look after important sticks and any special stones selected from car parks. Colleagues will need to be kept updated of the movements of any special items (Yes darling your pine cones are still in my handbag.)

Any disposal of important sticks, leaves or pebbles will be considered gross misconduct.

• Demonstrated ability to: Still see people even when they are covering their own eyes.

Candidates will be expected to play a version of the popular game Hide & Seek which involves neither hiding nor seeking but simply counting to 10 then pretending not to see someone standing directly in front of you.