There will be one child sitting quietly doing puzzles.
This will not be your child.
I had hoped this role was allocated on some sort of rota and that one week it would be my daughter quietly amusing herself whilst others looked on in awe. I seem to have been left off the rota.
(If I had a child who sat quietly and entertained themselves I would not need playgroup I would be sitting at home watching This Morning, painting my toenails and writing a blog about what a piece of piss small children are to look after. )
Lots has been written about how having a child will change your life, boundless love, sleepless nights yadda yadda yadda. But there is one unexpected change a child will bring: You will start seeing dog poo. Everywhere. Before I had children I would happily skip down shit filled streets knee deep in greasy chip wrappers […]
Easter holidays mean no playgroups so I have been busy trying to entertain my children at home. To date we have made (and eaten) Easter baskets, Easter paper chains and chocolate crispy cake nesty buns. The baskets and paper chains weren’t really meant for human consumption but try telling that to Eeh Bah Son. To […]
We’ve recently uprooted from London and moved to Yorkshire to be nearer family, I think it’s important the children get to spend quality time with their grandparents and even more important for me to spend quality time reading Grazia. The plan came to me when I was on the toilet breastfeeding my newborn whilst my […]