A guide to eating out with small children (with help from readers of The Daily Mail.)

When you take small children out to eat you have exactly however long it takes to order and eat one course minus 7 minutes before it all goes horribly wrong.

It makes no difference how quickly the food arrives the last 7 minutes of your meal will be spent shovelling  hot food into your mouth whilst one of you jiggles the baby or takes a toddler for a walk around the block.

One course? But what about starters and puddings?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Oh sorry was that a genuine question?